Your Girlfriend is very cold and distant lately. Something feels wrong, it seems like she lost interest in you and the relationship. You are afraid that she doesn’t want to be with you anymore.
In this article, I’m going to show you different signs how to know when a relationship is over. Use this signs to find out if she doesn’t love you anymore. It helps you to know the truth before your relationship is coming to an end. Maybe there is still a chance to turn things around. However the more of these signs she is showing, the harder it will be to save your relationship.
Disagreements become more frequent
Arguments and misunderstandings are common among couples but when fighting seems to become a hobby, it’s a definite red flag. There are “cute” or petty couple arguments which most often end up with cuddling and sweet kisses but if you notice yours tend to become frequent and annoying, we recommend that you take a step back and reflect. Good reflection questions are – “What are we arguing about?” “How often do we argue about it?” “How do we end our arguments?”
She picks fights with you over unimportant things
When girls crave your attention, they would sometimes put up a girly tantrum and would demand wooing. This is cute and it’s always a great feeling to know that you are needed or in this case, craved for. But if she tends to argue about irrelevant things and you swore nothing seems to make sense on the arguments she tries to start, it’s a sure fire sign that something is wrong.
Small things become annoying to her, she complains a lot
Not so long ago, your snore or your epic comic book collection doesn’t bother her, in fact she told you that she finds it adorable. But I guess that’s a thing of the past now. She starts the breakfast conversation by pointing out that apparently, she can no longer sleep soundly because of your loud and annoying snore. She’s even open to the idea that both of you needs to sleep on separate beds on certain times of the week! And just when you thought things wouldn’t get any worse, she then complains about your comic book collection taking too much valuable space in the living room!
You’re just not enough (Your job, education, car, friends)
Can you still recall the time when you used to dream and make future plans together? Well, of course you do and you still both do it now. The only difference is she seems less “dreamy” and is constantly pointing out that you should have gotten the promotion your boss gave to Kiss-A$$ Ken. She nags about how you’re not trying your best to impress your bosses and even predicts that you’ll be sitting in same cubicle for the next forty years. So much for moral support, eh?
Harmony and getting along after a fight is more important to you
Fighting over anything has been you and your girlfriend’s favorite hobby. Gone are the days when you look forward to anniversary surprises and impromptu movie dates. Currently your top priority is how to make up after every redundant fight. As matter of fact, you may not admit it but you have developed a habit of being more careful with your choice of words and how you’ll deliver any opinion as it might spark another “mood eruption”.
Less Time for You
You are seeing each other less
Remember when you two were inseparable and getting to work was such a curse because it would take another 9 hours before you see each other again? Well, those are plain very vivid memories that you are just left to imagine as you eat dinner alone because she needs to go on overtime to finish the finance report she had been blabbing about all week. You feel that you need to literally set up an appointment with her so that you can go out to grab a quick lunch and be part of her calendar.
She is busy and has less time than before
This is similar to the idea mentioned above. She suddenly became too busy for spaghetti Wednesdays and all other your routine couple activities that you both prioritized before. Both of you even swore that time should never be an issue with your relationship because you both know that it’s just a matter of setting up your priorities. Well, she certainly did – sad thing though is that you didn’t seem to make the cut.
She prefers to go out with her girlfriends
You’re not the type of boyfriend that makes a big fuss about ladies night. But whenever you invite her for dinner or even brunch she always got an excuse about meeting her girlfriends and how they have planned it days before you asked. Plus, she obviously got the “go-to breakup friend” role whenever they have the “BF emergency” – which is on a weekly basis.
Her career and hobbies become a priority
You have always supported each other’s career goals and pastime interests. Never did you imagine that it will eventually come between the two of you. You were once her number one confidant whenever she needed to vent out about her horrible boss and her first draft pick to judge the dish she just learned from her French cooking class. But aside from just plain dead silence, she obviously devotes more time in the office and her club/group meetups.
She cancels dates or has only a few hours
Just when you thought that you’ll finally have the much needed “we” time, she sends you a text message saying that she needs to cancel your date because of a work emergency or because one of the girlfriends had a timely breakup and she needs to give her moral support. So, yet again you sit alone at your reserved table while staring at the bouquet of tulips (her favorite) you had already picked up an hour before.
She doesn’t like public displays of affection anymore
You loved how clingy and almost “territorial” she gets when you go out in public places. She wants the world to know that you’re together, and she owns you. But know she becomes fidgety when you try to hold her hand as you walk home. She even finds a quick peck very inappropriate. You’re quite surprised how she became so conservative.
Cuddling after sex has become rare
Cuddling after sex is undoubtedly a girl thing. They feel more special and secured when we share that post-coital hugs and embrace. But that seems to be no longer the case; she can now fall asleep faster than you do. No cuddles or sweet kisses needed, she just dozes right off.
She doesn’t initiate touching like she did before
It’s your move or no move at all. That’s how it works now. She seemed to be very tired after coming home from work or the gym that she either goes straight to bed (to sleep soundly, of course) or read a book. No more sensual tickling or sexy caresses, and we can only guess where it all went.
She loses interest in sex; you’re the only one initiating it
She’s never in the mood. She’s always just too tired or would need to wake up for an early meeting. All intercourse-leading touches and strokes fail. She’s simply not interested and makes it a point to make it very obvious.
She got a lot of excuses to avoid intimacy
Her period and headache are always in-sync and perfectly timed to occur whenever you try to be intimate with her. She always got an excuse on why she can’t reciprocate your intimacy. You’re beginning to feel that she’s even annoyed when you try to be sweet or passionate to her.
She avoids long eye contact and romantic gestures
Before, looking at each other’s eyes without saying a word seems to be enough. Every girl’s “Dream Guy Checklist” would include being romantic. Flowers, chocolates, and candlelight dinners are mandatory. But unless her definition of romantic has changed, she doesn’t seem to be swept off her feet lately. Staring had been the only action left to do when she doesn’t feel like to talking to you.
Her pet gets more love and affection than you
There are times you wish you’re Snowbell or Meatball. She worries and cares about her cats and dogs more! You can feel the energy level shift when she greets them and when she greets you when she arrives home from work. She even enjoys walking the dog more than spend another minute with you.
Fewer calls and texts from her
You’ll be amazed how these modern communication technologies can make you drift further apart. Browse your phone, I bet the last message you got from her is either “OK” or “Bye”. You can’t even remember the last time you got a call from her, just to hear your voice and tell you how much she is missing you. It’s more likely that she calls to remind you about the dog’s vet appointment or well, to argue of course.
Communication is mostly initiated by you
Silence is golden to her, most especially when it means that she doesn’t need to talk to you. A day would go by and you won’t hear anything from her. Even on a weekend, she can let a day pass without saying a word to you. She’s always pre-occupied with her iPhone and laptop.
She replies short and emotionless
You actually miss the way she includes all the emoticons on her responses. From almost novel-like replies to one liners and now down to one-word responses – that’s your form of communication lately. Consider yourself lucky if you even get a reply.
She returns your calls and texts after hours or not at all
Sometimes you can’t help but wonder if your phone is broken or if you’re suddenly out of coverage area. You asked her what she wants for dinner and you may (or may not) get a text message four long hours later saying that she already had one with the girlfriends.
She asks fewer questions about what’s going on in your life
She used to love your stories and always asks about the latest updates on the current project you’re working on. She appreciates when you ask for her opinion but lately, she couldn’t care any less. Even when you tried to start a conversation with her, she’s either just giving you short answers or is not even paying attention.
She doesn’t care if go out with the boys
Before, you would need to ask for her permission a week in advance if you’re going to a boy’s night out. But for some reason you have earned an unlimited hallway pass. She doesn’t even mind what time you got home.
She’s not jealous anymore
She used to be very clingy to announce to the whole world that you are together and that you’re off the market. But right now, she displays zero interest on who you’re texting or meeting. She no longer asks who’s the random girl you added on Facebook.
She forgets important dates
Girls are innately bestowed upon the gift thoughtfulness. That’s why if she forgets about any important dates, there’s something you need to be really worried about. They have an internal calendar within them that signals special occasions, so if she constantly forgets those, you might not be so special anymore.
She shows no more interest in the things you enjoyed
Remember when she tries to learn your video games so you could spend more time together? Or when she comes with you on basketball games? If those are merely throwback memories and it’s no longer happening now, you might want to take a good look at your present relationship status.
She stops complimenting you or laughing at your silly jokes
She used to adore your sense of humor. But at present, you don’t even know what would make her smile, let alone make her burst into laughter again. Your knock-knock jokes are no longer doing the trick. She doesn’t seem to be pleased about anything that you do too.
Who else is coming? You are not enough
Your girl seems to be very uncomfortable being alone with you. She looks very uneasy and bored whenever you go out. Unlike before, your conversations have become very dull and boring. You feel like sharing a table with a complete stranger. It was a very different scenario when both of you used to talk for almost 5 hours straight without even noticing.
She’s late or tired more often
After arriving home from overtime (of course), she goes straight to the bathroom, takes a quick shower, brushes her teeth, puts stuff on her face and goes straight to bed. But if you’re lucky, you might get a “good night” and an emotionless peck on the cheek. Is this your normal bedtime routine? You might want to reflect on this one, brother.
She doesn’t notice your changes
The stereotype about men not noticing his girlfriend’s new haircut is just so old school. Girls are the ones that are naturally keen with those observations and I’m not just talking about physical changes. She goes nuts when guys aren’t with their usual moods. They’ll bug you to death asking what’s wrong, even if there’s nothing wrong and we just want to enjoy a moment of silence. Annoying it may seem, at least you know that she still cares. If she stops going crazy about your silence or changes there’s seriously something wrong.
She tells you what you don’t have in common
Both of you got a very mature view of your differences and accepted that there are some issues where you take on opposite sides. But given this situation, both of you respect each other’s opinion and refrain from being judgmental. Well, that was before. From your choice of clothes or restaurant down to your political views, she can’t help but notice how “different” and “unlike” you guys are. She would even pinpoint that your view is not just different, it’s wrong.
She highlights that you got different long-term expectations
Expectations are normal in every relationship. Reality is, not all expectations can be met 100%, or you might have different views on how your partners try to fulfill those expectations. This can be very tricky and would require patience and understanding. If your girl seemed to just notice your shortcomings and never miss a chance to point out what you’re doing wrong, you must definitely evaluate your status.
Her future plans don’t include you
You used to talk about how you both want to live in a lake house and own three dogs. But now, she seems to be using the “I” more than the “we”. It’s great that she still somehow shares her future plans to you but based on what you’ve heard so far, it’s solely about her.
She doesn’t make holiday plans
Girls are always excited about the holidays. It means no work and more love time with you. She used to have marked all of those in her calendar so both of you can plan ahead. But now, she doesn’t seem to care anymore. Heaven forbid she actually needs to work on a holiday.
She makes less effort to look good for you
She would always be stunning and beautiful in your eyes but where did all the little black dress go? You clearly remember the date nights you have to wait for an extra hour because she still can’t decide what dress to wear and she still ain’t done with her makeup. You never thought you’d miss those, right? It’s not just the physical attributes; it’s how she looks and feels when you’re together. She used to radiate happiness wherever you two went.
She makes more effort to look good if she is going out without you
And just when you thought that the little black dress is nowhere to be found, it suddenly resurfaces; but for an occasion WITHOUT YOU. You can’t help but notice that she exerts more effort in looking good whenever she’s going out alone. She even makes a salon appointment when she meets her girlfriends but would settle for a ponytail when seeing you. This is not a bad thing, most guys like the simple and natural look but the way she’s very self-conscious on her other dates makes it really weird.
She starts showing interest and flirting with other guys
You see the “look” and the “smile” she ones gave you a few years back. The hey-I-find-you-really-cute-I-don’t-have-a-BF flirty stare she’s giving the other guy across your dinner table. Of course she’s trying not to make it obvious but the more she tries, the more you notice. Don’t get me started how many times she did the hair flip.
She locks her phone and doesn’t want you to see something
Phone checking is usually part of the ladies department but with all the signs you’re seeing and feeling, you can’t help but wonder. So, one day while she’s asleep or busy in the kitchen you finally found the strength to grab her phone only to find out you don’t know her lock code. Well, technically you “knew” that it was your anniversary, but I guess she changed it to her birthday. Nope, that’s not it either. Another give away is when she seems to very uncomfortable answering and texting when you’re around.