Normally it’s not that productive to listen to the stuff women tell you about men and dating, because they don’t know themselves any logical reasons they are attracted to someone, woman just follow their feelings and rationalize it later on. But I still find it interesting to listen while they are talking about men, if you get the whole story and filter out the unimportant stuff, it’s surprisingly how every breakup, misunderstanding or changing in emotions makes sense, once you study this stuff long enough.
Yesterday I listened to one of the most interesting and insightful conversation between two women about men. Both were very hot and the narrator (Natalie) told her friend about her ex boyfriend (Jeff), why she dumped him and made fun of all the mistakes. She is quite experienced with boyfriends, this was her 6th relationship that lasted a few months and she’s in her early twenties. She dumped every of those 6 men because she doesn’t felt it anymore, except one, who cheated on her. He was the only one she every truly loved and left her very heartbroken. That’s why she concentrated her focus on nice guys so that she doesn’t get hurt like this again. Her recently dumped ex was a really nice guy, often I feel honestly sad about these guys, because they just don’t know it better.
Try to avoid the following mistakes, or you’ll get dumped:
1. Do everything for her without expecting anything in return
In the 5 months together, he did so many sweet things for her like sending a delivery man with cookies to her workplace, cooking dinner, buying flowers… you know that stuff. She liked it, on one hand, she often felt happy and appreciated, but she asked herself why is he doing all this to her. She does nothing for him and didn’t even earn this kindness in her opinion. Selfless love might be sweet, but it feels for her, as if he needs to work for getting her to love him back, like buying her affection.
2. Don’t be a challenge
He was no challenge at all, right from the beginning he offered her his whole heart and did everything, she had him already. That’s boring and feels like he isn’t a great deal, because the really attractive men have options and are not so easy to get.
3. Don’t have an own opinion
“He was always OKAY with everything, I hate that so much, it’s like he doesn’t have an own opinion” she said. It’s even worse, because what she didn’t say was that IF he has an opinion, he values his own opinion so low that he doesn’t even tell it to her. There is nothing she can orientate herself on, she feels alone because she needs to make every decision herself.
4. Be predictable and boring
He was always happy and friendly, whatever she did, he looked at her like a puppy looks to its mother. There was absolutely no danger, nothing exciting, nothing new, every time the same old boring predictable behavior.
5. Never argue with her
“He was slick like an eel, there where no corners, nothing hard on him, where you can rub.” Every time she tried, to fight with him, he did all he could to not get into any arguments with her. Yes, she TRIED to fight with him, woman do this often if they don’t have enough emotional stimulation. They want to give you the chance that you got some balls.
6. Let her disrespect you
Balls that show confidence in himself, so that he can fire back if she argues with him. When she notices that he has no balls, she starts disrespecting him, but not because she is a mean person. Woman do this to test how qualified you are to lead her through life and there is no better way to find this out, than to test you. Whenever she did something disrespectful, he did not get mad at all. Some times she even apologized to him, but his answer was “That’s okay, don’t worry “. She said “How can this be okay for you???”.
7. Give up everything for her
After her respect and attraction for him dropped to zero, she gave him all kinds of lies (“I’ve got my period”) to not sleep with him. But when the attraction drops, woman not only stop having sex with you, they also don’t want see you. She had a hard time telling him, that she doesn’t want to see him ever again, she tried to find another reason so she doesn’t hurt him with the truth:
“I think your job needs a lot of time and focus, I think maybe we don’t fit so good together”
She tried to blame it on the job, to have an easy way out, but than he surprised her for the first time, unfortunately in a negative way. He told her to quit his job, for having more time with her! Like I wrote before this wasn’t any job, it was his dream job, he had a leading position, loved what he is doing and made good money. How can you trash one of the most important things, everyone would love to have, for a woman that doesn’t even respect you? Of course this pushed her only further away, I’m really sorry for this guy.
This was a sad story, but things like this happen every day, don’t be that guy and try to avoid his mistakes!