Arrest

Excuse me… You’re not Susan Jensen, are you?

(They usually say no, then offer their name. If they don’t offer their name simply ask, “What’s your name?” Try to get the first and last name.)

Oh, in that case. You’re under arrest. (Turn her around.)

You have the right to remain silent. (Take her by the forearms.) Anything you say can and will be fucking hilarious, because I’m not a police officer, but you fell for it hard.

– Arrest Opener by Vincent Chase