Escalation takes a PUA’s new-found ability to approach and be friendly with random people, and converts it into a means to achieve more than friendly conversation. However this process can be a minefield to the uninitiated, and particularly when you are new to the game, your brain looks for an “excuse” for each step, wanting a socially acceptable justification for every action.
I have found one particular technique to be very helpful in creating the ‘excuse’ your brains need. This backdoor should work not only in your mind, but in hers (never forget that the girl is likely to be afraid of being seen as a slut, so you have to load your interactions with fictions and micro-games that justify each forward step). What is this technique?
Introduce a playful/flirty/sexual vibe in your first interaction.
There are three main variables to consider:
1) How overtly sexual should you be?
2) How soon should you introduce the vibe?
3) What do you need to do to maintain the vibe with her?
The more savvy among you have probably picked up that this is a good litmus test for whether she is considering you sexually as well. Any patterns in female response to you introducing this vibe should be considered feedback on the initial impression that you make.
This depends on what you want from the interaction, and on the girl’s nature. If you are looking for a quick fuck, get very sexual, if you are looking for the love of your life and will only bang after marriage, subtly introduce the idea of dating. Between those two points you should be able to see a rough continuum. Personally I prefer to begin mildly and gradually ramp up the intensity. For example when I was last in Austria, I started talking about kissing on the cheek as a greeting, then jokingly asked if you could tell a good kisser from their greeting kisses. No? Dammit. How will I know if you are a bad kisser? Are you? Let me be the judge of that. Bam. Makeout.
Again this is a judgment call. If you hit it off, and its just the two of you, go more quickly, and if there’s work to do and you are surrounded by her friends, you will probably need to wait a while. Often I will try to set a sexual foundation even before the interaction, either via text or Facebook. All I need to do to set the vibe is predate the face to face interaction with a cheeky joke (“ok we can meet up, but you had better be gorgeous”, if you want, let this stray into a conversation about what you find attractive in women). The essential aim here is to get her to think about your sexual conversation at the time you begin to escalate, and to do this you may need to maintain a sexual vibe.
If you introduce the idea of your sexuality early but (for reasons outside of your control) don’t escalate immediately, your sexual image will lose its potency the longer you are in her company and failing to act on it. So what can you do to maintain and reassert that sexual vibe?
– Don’t see her again until you can escalate. This is by far and away the most effective option. Absence makes the heart grow fonder (and the imagination wander).
– Escalate anyway. Fuck the rules and pluck the fruit while it’s ripe. This kind of action is always very hit and miss, but it is a great way to show off your balls of steel.
– Micro flirt. Load the interaction before your escalation with ambiguous looks and actions, but still escalate to the largest degree possible. This is very hard to do, and even if you do it perfectly, you will only be able to maintain this stasis for a limited time. Eventually the girl will bore or think that you are stringing her along.
Really you should just try to time your sexual setup well so that you don’t need to do any of the above things to keep the spark alive.
>(subtly introduce the topic of ex-girlfriends)
>Her: Why did you break up?
>Me: She didn’t poo on my face during sex, you would do that if I asked you to right?
>(lying on the ground trying to look at the stars)
>Her: Not a very good night for stargazing
>Me: But a good night for kissing
[roll over and make out] Yes that one is blunt and awful but it got me laid. It helps to have a good style but at the end of the day, if what you say works, then it is a legitimate technique.
>(Arranging to go to a party together)
>Me: If it’s boring can we sneak off and have sex on the roof. [joking tone]